I'm getting tired about all the crazy ideas I read about tantra, and the left door Tao school practices, and the crazy porn you see on the Internet and on TV and the fact that people think this is "making love" or the correct way to have sex. So a few words on sexual tantra. There are tantric cultivation methods without sex, which are called "Tantra" as well, but I wish to speak specifically about sexual tantra, or sexual cultivation.

It's not that easy to practice Tantra. Tantra is only used to cultivate the body and the five elements (chi) of the body, and NOT ANYTHING ELSE. It's only used to help transform the body (flesh). Rarely can you practice it and cultivate the body AND see the true mind. That's virtually impossible. Therefore, TANTRA IS NOT TO BE USED ON A REGULAR BASIS.

In the past 100 years, including what is now propagated as teachings from Tibet, when people mention "Tantra" it's all virtually nonsense. When you talk about Tantra, there's a BIG PRINCIPLE involved, and therein lies the real sexual tantra or sexual cultivation.

One of the parties in the Esoteric Buddhism schools of Tibet says that you can use tantra or sexual cultivation to change your chi channels. After your chi channels are transformed, you don't use it anymore. At most you can use it three times….in three very special situations.

Normally, in the past the girl partner was less than 16 years old and had a very special character with special merits. Therefore, rarely can you ever meet the right person as a practice partner in today's world - or even back then. People just don't have the merits. Even a Buddha would have a hard time finding a partner - it's virtually impossible. You need the merits, the girl needs to have the requisite merits, too. Unless you have cultivated in a past life, the only choice is for a goddess to transform into a yang shen emanation body to help you. Because it's hard to find a regular girl with the right merits, then most of the time it's a transformation of a goddess (dakini, Buddha Mother) who comes  to help the man succeed. This I've seen with my very own eyes. And once again I remind you, because it's so hard to find someone, past cultivation is necessary for someone to succeed in this route.

Now the "Kung Shr Mu" or Empty Wisdom (Behavior) Mother is the Chinese name for a goddess who transforms to help someone with sexual cultivation, which is the true tantra we're speaking of. Maybe I've spelled the Chinese  name wrong, but you'll get the idea. Most people think she is a fairy or goddess (dakini). They are basically enlightened females who have wisdom and see the true mind and have enough mercy to help. They already see emptiness and the true mind just like the stage of a Buddha… so it's hard to find one.

Now there are three schools for when you can use Tantra in the Esoteric Schools of Tibet (and forget about Taoism, Hindu/yoga schools, or Persian schools and current American/European because what you read is just nonsense):

1. Some people will use Tantra 1-3 times to try to see the Tao

2. Some people say to use it AFTER seeing the Tao to help go further and transform the physical body. If you  see the Tao yourself, in three lives you still won't learn what I just told you.

In the Yellow sect/school of Tibet, which is the school of the Dalai, Panchen Lama and Tsong Khapa, they don't teach sexual cultivation or tantra. They use it only once in their lifetime to get to the final stage. Previous to that, they just follow the strict rules of celibacy. If not, they are just cheating themselves and others. In ancient times, the great monks of Tibet in their old age would practice with nuns. They could do this because the rules of discipline for nuns never made it to Tibet, so they could then do this without breaking any rules. Never can you break the rules of discipline. Don't think it's so easy. Tsong Khapa changed the rules when he came along. He said you can only practice tantra (sexual cultivation) in the bardo stage after death — in your bardo body. The monks were permitted to use the dreaming/visualization method to get to the stage where they saw the Tao, saw the dharmakaya, and would only do it once at the last moment.

Therefore, even for Taoism, Vajrayana, etc. etc. the people all talk about tantra or sexual cultivation like it's casual or ordinary and happens all the time, but it's a very serious issue. What they actually say and teach and promote today is nonsense. It's all just cheating people.

Taoism even tells people how to find the right girl/woman as a practice partner. They say you must calculate her fortune, even those of her parents. The qualifications are extremely strict, so it's difficult, almost impossible to find a qualified female partner. I won't list them because then people will be calculating all this stuff and giving girls all sorts of troubles. Basically, the girl's fortune must be as good as that of the Queen Mother of the Country - her fortune must be good enough that she could be a Queen. You can read the story of Lady Yeshe Tsogyel. And the man has to treat her like a mother and take care of her once he achieves the Tao. If a cultivation woman finds a "dharma Father," she should treat him and take care of him as a father as well. Whether male or female,  woman or man, you have to want enlightenment very badly to be able to do this practice. You have to support the other person and offer them the BEST of everything, so it's not like normal sexual intercourse. Most men won't do that, cannot do that, don't want to do that. They want no commitment, just sex and "goodbye" - not even a "thank you" for the medicine provided.

In the Tao school, two people often agree to practice tantra or sexual cultivation together. But in Taoism it's not called "tantra" but is called "practicing the sword" or "making the sword." This is a term that only takes into account the man's side of the practice. They say "making a sword" because it's like sticking hot iron in water, taking the man's hot penis when it's aroused and then sticking it into the woman's vagina. That's the origin of the name.

The funny thing is, the penis does NOT always have to be hard to be good for the woman. The best penis condition in tantra is warm, full of chi and SOFT for the woman — she can tell it's not a hard blood filled penis, rubbery jing filled penis, but a warm-soft-comfortable chi filled penis and thus is soft and comfortable for her even though it's not rock hard solid like a sword. Even the modern Tao school practitioners today don't know this principle. We're not talking impotence, we're talking about chi channels and chi flow being open all the way through the penis. The women who like the rock hard penis are those who have NOT opened up their chi channels, and thus that's what they need because for them it's massage and not cultivation. But enough of that until later …

In the Esoteric School, they also take the issue of selecting a female partner very seriously. In this school, you need to find a woman who has lots of merits — a super nice temperament, very very kind character, good family, good education, excellent looks and figure, no blemishes, and so forth. They all have to be top, Top, TOP — the very best. I won't even describe the qualifications. One of the physical characteristics you need to look for is a red mark or depression, as though the chakra has opened up, in the region of the third eye (Ohm), throat chakra position (Ah), or between the breasts (Hung). There are other signs as well, but this is one of  the most important physical characteristics because it shows that NATURALLY her chi channels are already opened somewhat from past life cultivation. This is why a girl like this is so rare to find … even a Buddha coming to this world would have troubles finding such a partner.

Therefore, because it's almost impossible to find a human companion practice partner with the right qualifications like this, the best way for a man to practice is to pray for help from an enlightened Buddha Mother, an Empty Wisdom Mother. The man who wants to succeed has to himself be quite successful in his chi channel cultivation. That's why I always tell you to practice the skeleton visualization method and breathing practices and mantra practice or use Tsong Khapa's visualization instructions for opening up the central channel. Without the prerequisites it's useless. I already told you this stuff many many times. Now you're realizing there are other ways too, and that I know more than I usually discuss for even those methods, but if you don't know /practice the prerequisites then what's the use of discussing further? It's a waste of my valuable time. If a man's own chi channels aren't already open then he's just lying to any partner he's trying to work with. He just wants to fuck  girls only.

In the Red School of Tibetan Buddhism, when the two partners find each other, they'll stay together in a room for several days without leaving it. Sometimes it will happen in a tent they set up on a plain. The other monks will protect them by surrounding the room and reading sutras and reciting mantras all around it with their backs turned to it and eyes facing outwards. You cannot have any jealousy come up one bit during this practice for any of the participants. Then they will practice sexual tantra for 3 or 7 days and nights in this room. The monks will burn sandalwood to make the smell as pretty as possible…everything is made to help things be as comfortable as possible for the Buddha Mother. If the practice is very successful, you may even see a rainbow appear around the room or area. I won't go into specific details about all the preparations. The monks must be pure, the area clean … I've even seen a room in a Tibetan Temple used for a milder form of this practice that no one even knows had this purpose. Every day people visit this temple from all over the world and no one knows  that room was used just for tantra.  It's all very serious. It has nothing to do with sexual license, pornography, lust or anything like that. That's all a breach of discipline with extremely serious consequences. Serious consequences. VERY serious consequences.

As to the karmamudras, or imaginary dakinis used for sexual cultivation to unite the chi in the chakras and central channel, there are the Desire Realm, Form Realm (blue) and Formless Realm dakinis. The Formless Realm dakinis are easy to conquer.  Yes, conquer or subdue is the word because when people use the imaginary methods, they are trying to squeeze the yin and yang chi together in the chakra petals, and chi channels, and chakras themselves. You want to unite the yin and yang together that have become chakra petals or channels and then when unified it gets reabsorbed or pulled back into the main chakra base  instead of protruding outward. It gets reabsorbed and becomes flat. The Desire Realm dakinis take effort to convert but the blue Form Realm dakinis are incredibly difficult to subdue. Incredibly difficult. To go into it requires you to understand the Mind Ground, the Tathagatagarba, the alaya seeds, all your channels and chakras have to be opened, you have to have seen the Tao, you have to have performed lots of deeds of merit, you have to have made the Buddhahood vows of committment… all sorts of prerequisites are required before I can even describe these things to you — and that's just a description. You can't find any Tibetan books on this. What you read is just nonsense or just a hint of what you have to go through in tantra if you want to transform the chi this way. The energy required is enormous, and so you may have to eat clean meat like freshly steamed lobster or oyster or whatever in order to give yourself energy to continue. It's really really tiring because of the energy you use up. The better way is emptiness meditation — someone like Sri Nisargardatta Maharaj or Papaji's method or Ramana Maharshi's — and then it all happens naturally, but we're talking about tantra today.

As to regular practitioners, or a man with a yang shen emanation body of a Buddha Wisdom Mother — and yes these things are real and not imaginary, the feeling the two try to achieve during the tantric sex is higher than sexual orgasm. During this time it's not called orgasm because the joy and bliss are higher than anything sexual and there isn't any leakage (ejaculation) by the man because the jing chi is travelling up the channels, including the central channel and not just the back channel. The jing-chi is going up the du-mai (tu-mai)  back spinal channel as a sort of flow because of the shaking of the sex chakra which acts like a little pump. Even if the man ejaculates, his chi channels (chi mai) are still very good. After he pulls out his penis from the woman's vagina to rest, he feels like he is light and the joy and bliss is there. Sometimes it's as if the body drops away - he can stand there and see the body and feel it but it's as if hs mind is as large as the room or sky. But that's not all – IF  the man tries to practice tantra without caring about the chi channels of the other partner and how she feels,  then he is guilty of a breach of discipline. She's the one helping him, and sacrificing to do so. I'm sure for her it's not fun at all because she's an enlightened Wisdom Mother, and her realm is a lot nicer than a yang shen body here.

Anyway, the target is for the man to reach at least the first dhyana, but there are many stages to this which are possible - the beginning joy, middle joy and high joy. But I won't get into this. I talk about it in the Stages course. I will mention that this will require the generative force to climb up the du-mai channel, the sex chakra has to be open and the heart chakra as well, but I won't go into details for this. I will say, however, that the symbol for the sex chakra is a shaking golden cicada (as Buddha mentions in the sutras), or a Chinese Fu dog (those pug-tailed puppies so  excited that they sit there and just shake with excitement trying to wag the tail that isn't there), or the Old Testament Ark of the Covenant. You have to have already opened up the sex chakra and the heart chakra to be able to do this, but I won't get into details. All sorts of symbols people talk of refer to stages of cultivation like this, it's just that ordinary people don't know it.

Taoists don't even realize that the Yellow Emperor, in the  Yellow Emperor's Classic of Internal Medicine, probably practiced tantra because he had all these concubines and wrote on the topic and at the end of his life, it's said he ascended into heaven and took this retinue with him. Only someone who succeeded in tantra knows what this means — it refers to the transformed yin-yang chi flows within the body.  When Milarepa was cultivating and saw a thousand pulsating vaginas in the sky, and generated a thousand penises to satisfy them, people don't realize this refers to the bright points at the tips of the crown chakra petals, and he used a tantric means to combine the yin and yang chi for these petals. All these things are secrets now revealed — they're not secrets it just that you didn't understand it before. You had the story, you had the symbols, but you didn't understand because you never cultivated and reached that stage. You never cultivated to realize the stage of the scorpion tail, or carp becoming a dragon which happens when you break the sacrum tail bone free of the pelvis in your inner chi body, and push the remaining skeleton (you roll it up backwards) out of the chakra location at the back of the head. Bodhisattvas never leave the body through the crown chakra but ALWAYS use this chakra location at the back of the top of the head to push out the crap, otherwise they just become Arhats. Search 1,000 or 10,000 or 1,000,000 or ten billion books — even untranslated tantric yoga texts — and you'll never find this information I just revealed that will help you tremendously, and you must realize  I just helped you a lot by telling you that – it must be your lucky merit.

Most men think they're practicing tantra or sexual cultivation practice but they're just "making the sword" and fail all the time because they ejaculate. Even if you use your mind to suppress ejaculation it's useless because you've leaked already. That's why Taoism doesn't call it tantra but "making the sword."

People always wonder if it's okay for women to orgasm because they hear that men should not ejaculate. The I-Ching explains it: "yang will offer (give up), yin receives." Yang is brilliant, yin is reverent.  So yang gives off and yin receives. Even if a woman has 3-4 orgasms, it doesn't hurt her as much as a single man's ejaculation because her uterus/vagina is open and will suck back (reabsorb) the chi she loses. 60-70% of anything lost is re-absorbed, even part of liquid secretions. For a man it's different because when he ejaculates he cannot suck anything back through re-absorption. If he tries it's a mistake. Therefore some men mistakenly try to suck a woman's yin or hormonal secretions to supplement his yang (and women try to get yang to supplement her yin). Don't do this, and women don't let men try to do this to you. This is a sideways school, and not the proper way.  Even the porn movies show women trying to eat the man's jing to absorb it and this is nonsense - useless to try to get his yang that way. About 30-40% of women will get tired during intercourse. In that case they can have sex on their sides, then in a centered position, and then stop and rest. So most couples NEVER do it right and accordingly feel they are losing energy through sex.

In Taoism they also have the term "100 days of celibacy", which started in the Ming dynasty in the Wu Liu school. This is a time period spoken of by Taoism, but not the Esoteric school. The real 100 days of laying the foundation doesn't mean no ejaculation. It means you don't move your mind — it means THAT YOU ARE IN SAMADHI FOR 100 DAYS. That's the real 100 days. It doesn't mean you hold your jing for 100 days. That's the RESULT of this practice. Everyone gets that wrong. Of course, men and women can both hold their jing for 100 days for health and cultivation and that's good for them. It has lots of benefits. You can even press the perineum to stop ejaculation and still have an orgasm, but if you do this you will eventually get problems. Women may eventually get uterine cancer that way, and men will develop prostate and kidney problems.

My Teacher always laughs at those people who try to suck back their jing. It's already leaked out - it's like hormones you've lost but cannot reabsorb through the bladder, or like hair or nails you've cut off, so what's the point of any attempt at re-absorption? It's like shit, piss, phlegm or pus once out of the body, once out of its proper place. No matter what any sexual teacher tries to tell you, it's useless. You've already lost the chi. If you want hormones, get a hormone shot! 

The Plain Girl Sutra (where the Plain Girl talks with and instructs the Yellow Emperor) talks about how to use various sexual positions and postures to cure disease and illness. If you practice sex for a few hours without orgasm, it can cure illness. True. But how many people can do that? Different positions activate different chi channels, but no one understands this so no one is doing it. Even if you have the method, do you have the time to practice it?

Some girls, during sexual congress will faint, or cry or laugh and at that time the man practicing tantra with her should not pull out the penis but still just stay inside her. If he has to ejaculate, sometime she can press in even deeper so that he loses even less than he would were he to withdraw. At other times he can try to curl his toes and look up making a special SSSSSSSSS hissing sound with the mouth open in a large closed smile, like the 6 Taoist healing sounds for the lungs and triple burner, to try to let the chi rise  rather than escape. There are all sorts of things for regular couples to practice at home which I won't go into. One danger for some weak men is that they might activate an endless outpouring of jing that never seems to stop, which can actually kill them, so in the olden days the women would wear a needle in her hair and then take it out and punch the man's buttocks with it — like acupuncture –to stop the leakage of jing and prevent him from fainting. They actually STAB the man in the buttocks if this deadly scenario happened. We're not talking about an erection for 4 hours like Viagra or Cialis, we're talking about a constant steam of jing/semen being lost (dribbling out) that cannot stop and this is how to stop it. Some women may faint or even cry, and the man can bite the lip underpart of her nose if that happens. For instance in martial arts if someone starts to faint you grab and twist the two areas right under the armpits, and this is a similar sort of application of this idea.

There are all sorts of acupuncture spots for special situations that might occur that a man needs to know if he is to practice with a sexual partner. If the man loses jing and can't stop - stab a pin in his ass! If a women loses and cannot stop — push or bite to activate the acupuncture spot under the nose.

Actually, this is all just "double people yoga" rather than tantra. There's lots to learn about it. According to the real esoteric schools, there are 72 types of vaginas and 37 types of penises. For instance, a man's penis might be mushroom shaped, short and stubby like a big boss's nose - this type best fits a vagina that is shaped like a plate inside. It might be hooked, and   women with vaginas called "long straight bucket types" would prefer this the best. A penis curved sideways pleases the "twirling cavern shaped" vaginas. There are penises with long thin bodies and mushroom heads, or with bumps on the shaft - often a mark of natural kings. There is even a teaching said to be from Empress Wu Ze Tian, but that's just a name and might not be from her. But she (whoever it is) describes 7 types of typical penis shapes and how they are good or not good for women. If you're a woman then pay attention because no one, NO ONE, ever teaches anything about tantra for women. It's all from the men's side. If you want more, see "25 Doors to Meditation."

For instance, Shakyamuni taught that there can be five color tints to a man's semen or jing — white, clear (good), yellow (young men), red (for kings or queens) or purple (heavy red). They are hard to discern without the third eye, and all have different meanings. When the jing is watery, the man is usally sick or getting old because for old men it's like saliva. The details I won't go into, but Buddha described many of these things in various sutras, buit the majority of Buddha's teachings have never been translated into English. Buddha knew and talked about everything, just like Master Nan. For instance, in the Sutras he talks about a wish fulfilling tree in this human realm of ours, but a holy cow udder in another realm. The wish fulfilling tree is our chi channel structure of this physical body which looks like a tree when it unfuls (thr crown chakra is like the crown of a tree), and the Holy Cow refers to a special set of five udders or little nipple like protrusions in a dakini's vagina that's the termination point of her five chi channels for the five elements. Shakyamuni talked about lots of tantric things but regular people don't know it. Even the esoteric school practitioners don't know it and think their school is so great when in most cases it's the low class stuff that gets tossed around. For instance, that's why I told you that a Buddha is sometimes called a "Golden cicada," because when you activate the sex chakra it shakes and shakes and shakes and buzzes like a cicada, and you can change its vibration rate or frequency. If a Bodhisattva cicada landed on this chakra and shook it, you'd understand. The heart chakra is called UNSTRUCK because until it opens it doesn't have a thump sound to it, like being hit with a hammer or mallet. After it's open, every now and then that happens. As to the OHM sound it naturally orignates inside the chi channels below the sex chakra. It's the natural sound of the lower channel chakra chi. You can also find that Mara is like a glden poppy, and Vairocana like a great snail, or Mahakasyapa like a great lobster and  Purna like a Gingerbread man, but if you don't reach those stages of transformation, you won't know the meaning.

Now back to the penises for women … The first type of penis is soft, never hard, and thus is impotent and useless to a woman. The second is cold (in temperature) even when ready to work, and always ejaculates. The shape is okay and so you can still use this one despite the deficiences. A third type, which is the last of these three bottom grade types, is strong and hard when you touch it or put it inside the woman, and inside it immediately ejaculates. These three are the low grade ones according to the Empress.

A fourth one has a large diameter, and the feeling is soft like cotton to the girl and is good looking and you can feel warm chi inside it. The man needs lots of herbs to preserve his health and keep it in shape. The fifth has a tip like a knife (long, thin, pointing) which isn't good. But this penis type has lots of yang chi and is always warm. If it isn't circumscribed, lots of skin usually covers its tip. The more this type fucks, the stronger it gets never ejaculating. Women eventually get scared of this type of penis because it's strong and can fuck, but isn't good for them. It can do lots of work without ejaculation but isn't good for the girl  in the long run. She may want to orgasm but the man with this type of penis still wants to fuck (he can't stop) so the woman becomes uncomfortable with this sort of situation. This is actually most people's type of penis.

The sixth type of penis for the woman is where you can feel the energy pulsing in it when it's resting in your hand. It's long, it's warm and you can feel the heat there. It has a strong energy to it. Girls will feel that its every cell is full of chi, that every cell is alive because this man has cultivated a lot naturally , and his chi channels have all opened within it. A girl can go all night with this type of penis and not feel tired. It can match a woman's feelings, and even after it ejaculates, it can work again. This is a 1 in 10,000 type of penis.

The seventh type is from men who practice martial arts, qi-gong, eat herbal medicines and thereby transform their penis. Originally it's a cold penis, but after much practice and medicine, it now feels hot on the outside. This is a "false fire" type of penis. A regular person feels this type of penis is precious, but it's very bad for the girl even if it doesn't ejaculate or matches her needs. Why? Because she will get old quickly or die with constant use of this type of instrument because it will suck her chi away.

For women to evaluate a man's penis without seeing it, all she need do it look at the nose, because the shape will suggest the shape of the penis. The length of the second finger to the palm base is also related to the penis length, as well as the shape of the thumb suggests its shape. A woman should also check how a man's clothes fit below. Lastly, if he has red spots on the nose and drinks alcohol a lot, then he's probably useless and probably has a cold penis — the type of penis a woman won't like for more than one time.

There, no one ever tells women these things and no one ever instructs them at all about sexual cultivation or Tao school methods - it's always the selfish man's side you read about - so now you know something if you are a woman cultivator. Don't cheat anyone with your new found knowledge, and don't think you mastered it or understand anything just because you read it. I won't even  talk about grading women because men are big cheaters and all they want to do is "fuck" or have sex, so they aren't qualified for any teachings, even this low  level stuff. All they'll do is use it to cheat people. People all want a reason for sex, women too, and use cultivation as their excuse for being able to let go. Men have fewer inhibitions than women because they always want sex (yet still can be overly restrained or have inhibitions even when permitted via marriage, etc.), and women often tie themselves up in all sorts of knots to prevent themselves from letting go  during the act. Why? Because their minds are yin - full of restrictions. A woman's mind is yin, whereas her body is yang; a man's mind is (dirty) yang, and his body is yin. So you can find women with bodies that are easily cultivated, but hard to find good male bodies as cultivation partners. And for the men, while their mind's are yang (growing, pushing, do new things, expand), it's usually dirty yang with greed and lust and desire for power, money, fame. You can find women with reverent yin mentalities and good virtuous characters that make them natural cultivators, so that their chi mai (channels) are naturally clean, but usually the yin is binding, manipulative, tricky to deal with. The yin mentality has a harder time cultivating wisdom than the yang mentality (and as for children, they cannot cultivate prajna wisdom at all — only an advanced practitioner like Krishna can achieve enlightenment as a child, as did the spiritual teacher of Mongolian Khans).

That's why in karmamudra tantra you conquer the yin dakinis by forcing them to let go, give up their inhibitions or strange "enjoyment not permitted" injunctions, and forece them to submit or let go to find the bliss in emptiness. You have to conquer yin in tantra. Yin has to be subdued, it has to submit to the yang and become one, but it will only let it happen if it finds the right partner to submit to. Yin is meant to give up and receive (the I-Ching says "be reverent" or "receptive") and that's how it finds bliss and becomes yang. But note that this conquering does not apply to regular women or Wisdom Mothers — we're now talking about the method of freeing up the yin restrictions around chakras and chi channels that are thought bound so that yin and yang combine and together recede into the channel base or chakara base by uniting. It takes wisdom, skill, effort, self-introspection, etc. If someone has to describe it to you, you're not qualified. So we're not talking about abusing women or anything like that. Don't think it's this or other strange or egotistical or permissive notions  or you'll end up engaging in all sorts of  perversions and claim "I'm cultivating, this is tantra, you have to do this and listen to me, yada yada." Then the result is the Hells, so I won't go into this. 

The biggest thing missing in people's knowledge base, for both men and women, is that there is also a "sweet spot" within the woman's vagina — not the G-spot, but a chakra termination point that is important to sexual cultivation.  It's very difficult to find it — if you have opened up the third eye you can see a little flame there or if you practice the skeleton visualization practice you can know where it is for every woman naturally.  It's difficult for this sweet spot to come down during sex and be able to touch the penis so that the two chi channel sets are cooperating with each other and become  united. Usually it takes 30-40 minutes of foreplay, another 1 hour of tantra sex, and then finally it might start to come down so you can reach it. Yes, maybe 1 hour before you can touch it, though with subsequent sessions it comes down quicker and quicker. It's so difficult to reach and activate that spot, otherwise you wouldn't call this cultivation. As my teacher said, "If it was so easy then all the prostitutes in the world would be enlightened already." In the old days the Mongolians and Tibetans that conquered China and had sex with the girls  were very cruel and would try to stuff their anuses with cotton rags and other things in order to try to hopefully poke/push it down, but the only way to do it is to let it descend from the roof of the uterus/vagina naturally so the man's penis can touch it.  It must come down, slowly, gently and with the right partner, each time you can reach it quicker and quicker. A cultivated man can help a woman, and vica versa. I don't want to describe it because if you don't cultivate as a man, you'll never be able to sense it or pull it down because the chi channels in your penis won't be filled with yang chi (but blood and jing they will have, yes) and open and if you don't cultivate as a woman, you'd never find it or be lucky enough to find a guy who can touch it for you either. Most men are dirty, which is why the asura men are said to be ugly and their woman beautiful– it's the chi of their minds that's dirty, not their looks, because they cling and are not pure. Anyway, when the two cultivation sets of chi channels touch at this spot — the man's cultivated chi channels all clean through his penis and the woman's chi channels, it's like touching a spot of electricity. If the woman is very young and healthy and thus her channels are relatively clean even though she doesn't cultivate, it's easy for a man to bring the spot down, but if the man has dirty chi or his channels aren't open, then forget it. Like I said, for women it's 3 or 5 within 100 that are qualified, for men it's 1 within 10,000. Once again this is NOT the G-Spot….only cultivators know this and when skilled women find it they're so surprised they even had it because they know what different orgasms are like, they know what the G-Spot is like, and this is none of that. Maybe 3-5 out of a woman are qualified to even have the experience, but for men my teacher always says you have to search through 10,000 (maybe a bit less) to find one capable at this. That's why it's impossible to find partners for tantra.

There are all sorts of tantric teachings that are only passed down by mouth. Frankly, you're lucky to  be reading this because no one gives out this information, but I'm so sick of the crap I see and the lies and cheating and especially the wrong stuff on pornography that people champion as sexual ecstacy and bliss that it's time to correct matters. When the restrictions are now as loose as they ae in society, now you have to reveal the real way, right way, ELEVATED WAY to have sexual realtions. This is how men become men and women become women — when they cultivate  their chi and chi channels in HARMONY this way. I always laugh at the books I see on this topic, because the 10-12 pages I wrote in "25 Doors to Meditation" reveal more than ALL the published books and videotapes and self-proclaimed authorities on the topic, and I've just taught you a little more right now, yet people don't believe this is tantra. It is, but just the BABY stuff….and yet you cannot even find THIS material anywhere. So I laugh at all the guys and girls trying to make money off of this and cheating themselves and others - you cannot spiritualize lust,  Period! Yes you can make money off it, but you cannot spiritualize it or elevate it. This is true chi mai cultivation we're describing, so it's already elevated, it's already at a different, higher level and the unity, bliss, joy you receive is higher, much greater than sex and the committment required much stronger. You've got to cultivate, practice lots of charity and giving, collect merits that way, open the chi channels and chakras and practice pure living to do it. You want to be a Mafia king or Rapper or Rocker and try this — forget it. The morality and virtue and merit required are much, much, much higher than for oridinary people and ordinary living  if you want to achieve anything this way. Frankly, if you don't cultivate and do lots of good deeds, it's impossible. You can't just have sex in all sorts of new and strange or unusual ways, with one or many partners, and call it sexual cultivation. Baloney. B*&$Sh*T! Go get some hormone shots to "replenish your yin" if you think that way.

It all starts with discipline, emptiness meditation, and the skeleton method, and lots of merit making. The best you can tell people in the ordinary world is to learn to have sex without ejaculation  but without holding, to avoid colds/drafts and cold drinks during sexual activities, to rest in the emptiness/bliss of it without clinging, for the woman to throw away inhibitions and restrictions and open herself to the man, for the man to take care of her and bring her to comfort instead of being selfish with his own pleasure, to try to match the chi with harmony, and treat each other with care and respect, and so forth. Foreplay is important for arousal, but sexual tantra or lovemaking is not like the active sexual acrobatics or sexual yoga or fucking you see in porn movies or TV. That will never amount to anything, and certainly won't satisfy the girl/woman in terms of chi harmony. If both partners peform well, afterwards they are not tired but energized and actually look great, look better than before. So you can even use it as a type of medicine when the weather is bad or your own chi seems stuck.

If you practice with a condom, that's an insulator of chi which is useless. …and will even irritate a woman after prolonged usage. You never hear that, do you? Sure it prevents disease and babies and satisfies all the politically correct who want birth control and no STD, but for tantra? You don't even know cultivation basics 1-2-3 if you think that's right.  I just laugh at how bad that is and yet the poltiically correct of course don't know anything so just champion their simplistic notions of how to change the world for the better. That's just yoga or massage or fucking, not tantra or sexual relations. Once again "no condom" means having the right partner in the FIRST PLACE where you don't have to worry about all those things, not about using a condom.  If there's no CHI COMMUNICATION between the parties because of insulation like that, then any old man will do for a woman and any old girl will do for a man because it just becomes massage, and then you can kiss society and families and social stability goodbye. Society slowly degardes when you promote such methods because of what REALLY happens along routes unintended. Idiots.

But enough. I've given you enough to understand this topic better than 1000 books on the topic, as I always try to do with all the MeditationExpert stuff so you don't get cheated or taken, because you can't find 1000 books on the topic. You won't even find one.

Good luck with 2008. Be Well. Cultivate. Practice merit making and virtue.

And by the way, don't write me with questions because I've already revealed all I want to, and I don't give teachings or write responses on this sort of topic. The old statement applies, if you have to ask you're not qualified. I tell you OVER AND OVER AGAIN, you have to know everything, learn everything about all sorts of topics. That's cultivation…go read SUPER IMPERIALISM by Michael Hudson  (or Confessions of an Economic Hit Man) to understand how the world really works, as an example.

Cultivation is exactly like this — you have to know about the human physical body, sex, human relationships, medicine, psychology, weather, meditation, literarture, science, and so on and so  on. Don't stick your head in the sand and try to think this stuff isn't real, doesn't exist, isn't important, is evil, forbidden, so bad, doesn't apply, doesn't matter, doesn't enrich life, you don't need to know it because it isn't in the Bible, etc. etc. Cultivate wisdom. Read LOTS of sutras. Study and cultivate, mix the two together. You are laymen and laywomen, not monks and nuns, so you have to know this and should know this sort of thing. This is what culture is made up of, information like this that's very helpful and helps people arrange their lives meaningfully and comfortably. So elevate yourself and your  relationships, don't pollute society with all sorts of strange crypto- or crazy permissive notions that anything goes and anything is possible and won't hurt us, that parade around as what's "natural" or "good" (Masturbation is good for men? Ridiculous!) just because they are common or normally done. 

What I'm discussing is all HIGH CULTURE. What you see on TV and in magazines as the embodiment of sex is low culture. Men typically think, "I want sex with a hot looking girl," but most of the models, actresses or singers you see aren't qualified for this sort of practice. Go meet a skinny model or balerina. Their bodies are usually in terrible shape, though everyone thinks they'd be a good catch. Their chi channels are awful. That's why the "Plain Girl" sutra is named just that, because that's where you're most likely to find the girls with the best chi channels because of their outstanding  personalities, temperament and virtuous characters. Self-cultivation, education, culture — whatever you want to call it – all has an effect on the chi channels.   So if you think some Victoria Secret's model is the cat's meow, just let her open her mouth to talk and you'll find all the qualities of virtue, cultivation, education, culture and so forth missing. That's why they rarely let the model's talk - when they open their mouths the dream is broken because reality appears. No smooth chi, no cultivated chi of any type, just an outside interesting shape. No culture, no virtue, no attempt at self-cultivation for self-improvement. It doesn't matter where anyone stands in life, but you have to down at those who do not practice introspection or the practice of self-improvement, because that's what's important. The rest all changes or fade away, but this is what you want to find in a woman. If a woman cultivates her character, virtue, modesty, honesty, chi channels, good works, that's actually what's to  treasure. We're attracted to the outside because we think it's a reflection of the inside, but that's not necessarily so — it's like biting into a shiny apple hat you find is rotten and mushy inside. When the character and virtue and merit are great, it's also because the person's chi and channels are in great shape, which is what you want. That's why you can't find a tantric partner — the outside may look good, the qualifications might seem to be there, but the inside character, virtue, morality, merits and gong-fu is lacking. I can think of several rich, educated, socialites that appear on TV all the time who fail in qualifications because they don't cultivate themselves. Even worldly character improvement is all about CULTIVATION.

And women who think that muscle-bound men are the best find  will just find  fucking machines, but no chi channels open and no posssibility of chi communication (and sometime no chi because it's all been diverted into muscles) - just sexual massage. Of course some women need that because they themselves are hard and not soft from too much athletics or from lack of cultivation. Or if it's a great looking model type appearance they want, they'll find the same thing as men find with women — it may be attractive for sexual excitement, but there is usually no content inside and you usually find zero chi communication in the bedroom skills.  Once a woman actually finds out what "chi communication" means in the bedroom, then everything else they've ever experienced sexually is usually thrown out the window because it typically was just an exciting massage, and nothing more. Or if she wants to pursue money then once again she'll be  missing the cultivation element that might keep her happy in the bedroom.  Woman always have a harder time than men because a man can still find a handful of women out of a hundred with good clean chi channels — women trained to be soft, feminine, receptive without trained to be alpha-men. Men can still finaly a handfull out of a hundred women with naturally calm minds and good chi channels, yet it's getting harder in countries like the US where the sex roles are all messed up. As to males,  most men are dirty - their minds are greedy or selfish, their chi channels are dirty and not open - including the bodies of celibate monks because they still cling - and they pursue all sorts of unhealthy things. Only someone who succeeds in cultivation has open chi channels that can help the other person. But if two want to try to help each other together, that's their own business.

If you find the right partner and have sex correctly by harmonizing the chi, you'll feel relaxed, soft, wonderful for and entire day or even on through the next day, and that's what you want to strive for — it's good for health, for cultivation, for appearance, for anti-aging, for changing the character and temperament. Yes, it can even use it to help tame your character and temperament because you feel soft and warm the whole day (and thus can let go) because the chi flow has been ignited/initiated. But it takes practice — that's why it's called cultivationpractice. This isn't tantra, but cultivation practice. To speak of tantra, you must have already opened up your chi channels and chakras, seen the Tao, know the Buddhist cultivation teachings on wisdom, and have lots of virtue and merit. I won't go into it. As my teacher says, everyone wants to hear, but who can understand?

Society is all mixed up about these things, especially training women to be like men. Yes, equal opportunities are correct but don't train yourself to lose your feminity. If you travel to Asia, South America or Europe, all these coutnries know what I'm talking about in terms of the destruction of American women losing their feminity. They themsevles hate to hear that becauise they're just a product of their own culture and don't even see it, so usually don't comprehend but they're just destroying themsevles and their chances for happiness, not to mention health, looks and peace of mind. If a woman, for instance, wants to be a famous singer, actress and so forth … and wants a good marriage too, then she's just  fooling herself, stacking the odds against herself — if you  train to be an alpha-male yourself, and then want an alpha male to want to marry you, what do you think will happen? Will an alpha-male listen to if you want to be the alpha-male yourself? Do you think you'll have a good lasting marriage ? That's why female entertainers often marry their managers because they are the only ones they'll listen to — the only ones that appear to be alpha-males to them.

But enough of this. I only wanted to tell you that society's ideas as to what is an attractive male or female partner are all mixed up, and training men to be feminine or the feminine to be masculine has not only proven to be a disaster (look at divorce rates, etc.) but one could know from the start because the chi flows are all mixed up. Go read the sages and learn to understand yin yang chi harmony if you want to comprehend things on a higher level than the typical social planners do. The social planners only  understand how to destroy culture for material or materialistic goals, and know nothing about how to arrange things so that everyone finds happiness in life, as well as peace, joy and contentment. We should study France more. Look at it — are people happier now then  when things were slower, less developed and less frenetic but more stable? They're stuck on materialistic measures and  economic productivity numbers that bring nothing along these lines but are just destroying people and culture. Only the older generations understand this; the kids don't because they think everything is normal, because this is what they grow up with, so year after year it's getting worse and worse and worse and no one can stop it. Even a sage can do nothing now because it's spinning out of control, and all the policies or opinions bandied about have no cultivation background at all which taps into the ROOT OF IT ALL. The sages are the only reliable guides, yet people ignore them. People cannot even comprehend what I'm speaking about when I talk about cultivation, and are more interested in their X-box and Wii or computer and new camera cell phone anyway. And past that level of understanding the "chi" of society and culture on a world or national scale, there is the level of shen harmony which I won't even get into.

 We'll leave it at that. Just a few words on Tantra.

… By the way, are you interested in hearing more? I recorded about 2 hours of information on a CD that you can get here:

http://Kunaki.com/Sales.asp?PID=PX00U5T6U3

Just pop it into your computer to play it. More information than all the other teachers out there on this topic, for sure.